The Yearning: The Sequel to "The Searching." Free Longer Story

 

Inspirational fiction 

The Yearning:

The Sequel to "The Searching."

Copyright: Alison Lawrence 2024. All rights reserved.

***

Dedication: To all who are yearning for so much more.

***

Chapter One

(Author's note: Han is pronounced Hun.)

It was only six o'clock in the morning, but Lidda could already feel it was going to be an unpleasantly hot day. She emptied her basket of cabbage scraps into the chicken coop, looking around for Han as she did so. He and his brother Vinny would have finished milking by now. No doubt they’d be in for breakfast soon. Lidda allowed herself a small sigh. She wasn't one to complain, but sometimes, the burden of her workload and of being a young wife rested very heavily on her shoulders. She entered the cool kitchen once more, and stirred the obligatory porridge before starting on the eggs. Her mind drifted quite naturally to Tirsa. Where are you dear one? How I wish you'd come back to us. Lidda missed her quirky free-thinking sister more than ever now that she was married to Han. She admitted privately that Tirsa had been right to be wary of marriage, and imagined how she would unburden her heart to Tirsa if she were still in Sybella.

Han merely nodded in Lidda's general direction as he stomped into the kitchen a short while later, and Vinny did the same. Lidda dipped her head in return before turning to the porridge pot. She scooped out two large helpings as well as a smaller serving for herself, then set the bowls on the table. She'd already placed milk, butter, bread, and preserves on the table in readiness for the men's huge appetites. Now, she scooped the eggs onto a platter alongside a mound of bacon. Han nodded curtly at her before digging in, and Lidda found herself wondering yet again whether this was all she had to look forward to in married life. She longed for a deeper connection with her husband, but so far, her role seemed to be nothing more than that of servant. In the five months she’d spent as a married woman, she'd done everything she could to keep her good-looking husband happy, just as her mother had always modeled. A couple of weeks into married life, she'd questioned her mother about the ways of men. “Mama, are all men alike?” She'd asked. 

Euphemia had sighed slightly. “Mostly. They are practical creatures. All they want is plenty of food, a well ordered house, and a mother for their children.” She shrugged. “Some may differ, but I have yet to meet any here or in Timnon. If a woman wants a man who prefers pleasure over an orderly house, then Beryl’s the place to look. I should know. It's where I was born.”

“But can a man learn to love, Mamma? Does Daddo love you?” Lidda asked the question hesitantly. It wasn't something she'd ever thought she'd ask. Up until her own marriage, she'd just accepted things the way they were. 

Euphemia took a sip of tea then made an impatient gesture with her hand. “How would I know? I suppose you could say he loves me. He's stayed all these years, hasn't he?”

“Do you love him?” Lidda risked the question.

Euphemia snorted. “What crazy question is that? I work hard for him and the children all day. I must love him. Why all this talk of love anyway? Just serve your husband. Love will come.”

So Lidda had dutifully followed her mother's advice. She served Han day and night. She tended the chickens and goats as well as a large vegetable garden. She did all without audible complaint, yet Han remained self-absorbed; seemingly unaware of her need for companionship and tenderness. In the privacy of her thoughts, Lidda couldn't help wondering whether Han yearned for Tirsa, the promised sister. The truth was, she was a replacement bride; the second choice. Not only this, but she knew that her own looks could not match Tirsa's. How she wished for the courage to ask Han whether her fears had any merit; but she was afraid to hear his answer.

Lidda rose from the table to fetch coffee for the men. As she scraped her chair back, Han looked up. His eyes rested on her belly, then met her own. The slight smile on his lips brought sudden light into her gloomy thoughts. They would soon be welcoming their first little one into the world, and Lidda felt sure that Han would learn to love the mother of his child.

***

“I can see that married life suits you.” Laughed Vinny as they returned to their work, this time in the pasture. “You’ve put on weight for sure.”

“My woman learned to cook well in her mother’s kitchen. She takes good care of the animals and the garden. Yes. You could say married life suits me.” Han grinned at his brother. He whistled as they worked to fix some fencing. He hadn’t told Vinny, after all, some things were private, but he was mighty pleased with his new life. At first, he’d been angry and disappointed at Tirsa’s desertion, but now, he felt almost pleased that she’d run away. As a result, he’d been given the better sister, to his way of thinking. The fact that Lidda was younger, was also a good thing: more progeny would come from their union. More helpers for the farm. As for looks, Han would even go so far as to say that Lidda’s plumpness and soft brown eyes appealed far more to him than her sister’s slender form and unfathomable gaze. 

***

Several months passed, and Lidda grew heavy with child. She rejoiced with every bounce and kick the little one made and wondered whether the strong movements indicated that she was carrying a robust boy. That would surely please Han. A future helper to join him in the never-ending milking and other farm chores. Like many other women, she hoped that he wouldn’t be terribly disappointed if the baby were a girl. As for herself, she didn’t mind if she did have a sweet little girl: a girl would spend plenty of time learning alongside her in the kitchen. Such thoughts revolved in her mind daily, especially as she and Han sat side by side in the sitting room after supper. Lidda’s hands had plenty to do with all the baby clothes and blankets which needed to be made. Han whittled quietly in his fireside chair. He’d finished the baby’s cradle, which now stood at the ready near their bed. Like the cradle, Lidda too, waited: not only for the little one, but for her husband’s love. Han seemed fairly happy. He never complained about her house-keeping or her cooking. And if the way he devoured her fresh bread was anything to go by, he approved of her baking. Yet, as she sat by his side, evening after quiet evening, her hope of Han softening to her began to fade. Her one consolation was that the baby might make him love her.

Chapter Two

Yoni whistled as he steered the rototiller along the staked out ground. He’d got to grips with the machine quickly. Life on Ettie's farm wasn't much different from life in Sybella. With help from Ettie, and even some enthusiastic pointers from Tirsa, Yoni had learned all he needed to know for the simple life they were living.

“Lunch is ready.” Tirsa called from the porch of the small cabin he'd built with help from Ettie's neighbours. Yoni turned the machine off and headed inside. He drew his wife into his arms and kissed her before she could shoo him off to the sink. Tirsa swatted at him with her dishcloth, but her smile was wide. “The food will go cold.”

“Have I told you today that you're beautiful and that I love you?” Yoni said as he scrubbed his earth-caked hands.

“At least five times.” Tirsa’s laugh was warm. “But you can tell me all day if you like.”

“Maybe I will. Our little one needs to hear it too. And how much I love him or her.” Yoni smiled, then bowed his head before tucking into his chicken and vegetables. Tirsa's heart swelled with love as she watched him. Their first little one stirred as though responding to its father’s voice and she placed her hand on her rounded belly. “He says he loves you too.”

Yoni dropped his fork with a clatter and placed his hand near hers. “She's as busy as her mother. I never get tired of her kicks.”

“She? Her?” Tirsa teased Yoni. 

“You mustn't speak. All I hear from you is he and him, not so?” He laughed. “I'll be happy with either. Our Creator has blessed us with a child. And he has given you to me. I'm the happiest man on Adama.”

“And I am the happiest woman alive. God is so good.” Tirsa kissed Yoni softly before taking their plates to the sink. None of the little niggles of pregnancy or of life on a farm bothered her. She was so blessed. The only shadow in her life was the separation from her family, and now that she was with child, she longed to see them again.

  ***

“And a girl needs her mother at a time like this.” Ettie rocked some more in the pale dawn light. “I understand, Lord, but I guess I’m feeling a bit selfish. It’s been a lot less lonesome around here, and we’ve doubled the herd and the chickens.”

Ettie sighed a little as her gaze turned towards the south. A year had passed since Tirsa had brought Yoni back to the farm with her. A wonderful year, filled with fellowship, learning, and laughter. A couple of times a month the three of them got into Ettie’s truck to visit her son Elias in Farley. There, they would fellowship with her son and his family as well as with other believers. They also attended the farmer’s market and sold their produce there.

Recently, Elias had told her that it put his mind greatly at ease to know she was no longer alone on the farm.

On their first trip to town, Tirsa and Yoni’s eyes had stood out on stalks. First, they’d had to get acquainted with Ettie’s rather noisy middle-aged truck. Farley had also left them speechless. It wasn’t a large town, but it had its fair share of shops and infrastructure. But her young friends were much more at home around machinery now. They also enjoyed the busy market and the company of Ettie’s friends and family, but she knew it would take them more time to feel at home in the more modern surroundings of the town.    

In a short space of time, her young friends had become like family to her, and their first little one was on the way. Surely the baby would be as dear to her as her own two little grandsons. Ettie’s heart hurt to think of the possibility of Tirsa and Yoni going away, even if only for a short while. But Emanuel was right. They needed to tell their families about Him.

She got up and eased her joints into action. Perhaps I should ask Tirsa whether they have any plans to return.

***

Mid-morning, Ettie made her way through Yoni's neat rows of vegetables. She spotted her young friend at work in his new patch.

“Morning Yoni. Sowing your beets, I see.”

Yoni straightened and smiled at Ettie. “Yes. They're an easy and dependable crop.”

Ettie chuckled. “There's always space for another row of pickled beets in the pantry. Say, do you think Tirsa feels like a visitor?”

“You go on up, Ettie. If you can get Tirsa to sit down for half an hour with a cup of tea, I'll be a grateful man.”

“Busy as a bee, huh? Well, that's normal in the middle of pregnancy. She'll slow down some before baby arrives.”

Ettie admired Yoni's vegetables, then stopped to greet Felix. “He's a special horse.”

Yoni beamed. “He's a miracle.”

***

“Ettie! I was about to come down to help you.” Tirsa led the way to her neat as a pin kitchen. The one bed-roomed cabin may have been small, but Tirsa felt like a princess with the indoor bathroom, running water, and a separate sitting room. 

Ettie smiled. She looked around quickly, taking in the cheerful posy on the polished table and other homey touches. “No need to come help today. Your Yoni was over earlier to feed and water the animals. But you can put that kettle on, then we can have a nice old visit.” Ettie's eyes twinkled.

Tirsa lit the gas under the kettle like an old pro, then arranged jam tarts and cookies on a rustic pottery plate. It never failed to remind her of home.

“You're sure you don't need help today? Don't you have some beans to put up?” Tirsa smiled as she thought back to the first time she'd helped Ettie to can beans.

“Sure as sure.” Ettie flipped her long silver plait behind her shoulder. “Those beans are sitting pretty in the pantry ready for the market.”

Tirsa gave in with a smile and placed tea leaves in a round brown teapot. “I'm ready for the market too. I just hope I've got enough jams and preserves to keep all our customers happy.”

“I'm sure you will, dear. And if not, just take an order.” 

Ettie complemented Tirsa on her melt in the mouth tarts.

“Thank you. Mama taught me to make these when I was just a little thing.” Tirsa’s tone was wistful as she poured the well-brewed tea.

Ettie slowly stirred honey into hers. “You must miss her so. Especially now.”

Tirsa’s eyes grew damp as she looked down at her shrinking lap. It was true. Her mama knew everything about childbirth, whereas Ettie had only given birth once. But no…

“I do miss her, Ettie. I miss all of my family; even Daddo. But you are like a mama to me. You’re our family now, Ettie.”

“Aw, child. I feel the same about you and Yoni. And your little one.” Her own eyes were tearing up. “But, may I ask, have you been hearing any whisperings from Emanuel? Whisperings about returning home for a visit?”

Tirsa was quiet for a few moments. She busied herself by refilling the milk jug and pouring more tea. At last she spoke. “Oh, Ettie. I have. Especially when I read about the adventures of Emanuel’s followers: how they went all over Adama sharing the Good Message.”

The baby stirred within her as she spoke, reminding her of her fears. “But, Ettie, if we go back, they may not receive us well. And what will Han and my father say when they see that I am married to Yoni and carrying his child?”

Ettie quickly went to put her arms around the young woman who had become like a daughter to her. “I understand, Tirsa. I understand. Don’t upset yourself. We will keep praying. And in the meantime, you will stay here, and I will take good care of you.” Ettie gave Tirsa another squeeze before gathering the tea things.

“Now, where’s that knitting of yours? I’m going to wash these dishes.”

***

“Ettie asked me today whether we’ve had any thoughts of returning home. To visit, that is.” Tirsa placed her head on Yoni’s shoulder as they sat together after supper. “She was wondering whether Emanuel has been calling us to go home so we can tell our families about Him. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it since.”

Yoni drew her closer, and Tirsa felt comforted. Perhaps he’d say that she needn’t worry; that there was no need to be thinking of Sybella and home. Especially now. But he didn’t. Instead, he drew a long breath. “Emanuel has been speaking to me about going for some months now. I hear Him clearly. But because of your condition;” he stopped talking and touched her swollen stomach gently, “I was hesitant to speak with you. And I kept telling myself that going back can wait. At least until after the baby is born.”

“Well, can’t it?”

Yoni’s voice was soft; gentle. “I’m not sure it can love. There is an urgency to Emanuel’s whisperings. The Book is full of urgency too.”

Tirsa’s frightened thoughts stilled. She nodded. “It is, Yoni. I feel it too.”

They sat in silence, holding one another, their thoughts racing in all directions.

Then Yoni’s face brightened as he picked up The Book, which lay on the table before them. “Tirsa, we need to go soon. And we need to pray as never before.”

Chapter Three

Euphemia brought the bowl of buttered potatoes to the table, then sat in her usual place. 

“Well, let’s tuck in.” Said Adolphus. He drew his plate closer in anticipation of his wife’s cooking. Euphemia dutifully filled his plate with a hefty scoop of everything, but her thoughts were far away. Just looking around the table had caused them to wander. Where was her girl? Why hadn’t she returned? A year had passed. Surely Tirsa would want to come home. Euphemia had already decided that she would take no nonsense from Adolphus. Tirsa belonged at home and that was that. She couldn’t bear to think of all the danger Tirsa might be in: a young unmarried woman out alone in the world. Her mind refused to travel to the un-thinkable. 

News had traveled fast after Tirsa’s disappearance, and news had come back through Detta that there was no trace of Tirsa in the Southlands. That could only mean one of two things and either option brought dread to Euphemia’s heart. 

As for Yoni, he’d disappeared without a trace soon after his search for Tirsa had begun. His mother, Lena, had confided in Euphemia that what kept her going was the hope that the two young people had found each other and were now married. And, hopefully, living in some small, overlooked hamlet far, far away from the evil North-Lands.

Euphemia found comfort in Lena’s speculations. Now, if only the young couple would return to the place they belonged, she thought. Adolphus would just have to put the past behind him.

***

“You’re getting as hefty as one of my heifers.” Han said as he helped Lidda up onto the wagon seat. “This will probably be your last outing.”

“Yes.” Lidda felt compelled to respond, but she fell silent again quickly. Her heart smarted at Han’s remark. It wasn’t the first time he’d made a crude or unfeeling comment, but it still hurt. Perhaps that was all she was to Han. Just another heifer.

“Sure looking forward to your mama's cooking.” Han’s whip cracked through the silence as they rumbled off towards her childhood home. Lidda merely nodded. Another barb to her heart. She felt like a plant dying of thirst around Han. He never complimented her and never asked about her day or how she was feeling.

From time to time he’d look her up and down, then nod his head and say something like, “developing nicely I see.” Or, “He’s going to be a big baby.”

“What if it’s a girl?”She’d once ventured, her eyes downcast.

Han had shrugged. “No problem, I suppose. As long as the next two or three are boys. We need plenty of hands to help on the farm.”

Gloom settled around her shoulders. She tried to shrug the feeling off; to smile; be a contented, serene wife. After all, this was what she’d been brought up to be: her job was to take care of her man and to bear many children for him. The problem was, it no longer felt like enough. And what would happen once she was old and fat? Would he push her to one side, as though she were a cow that had served its usefulness?

***

                         

“I envy you, Lidda,” said Freda, a dreamy expression on her face. “How I wish I had my own man, not to mention my own kitchen and a sweet little baby on the way.” She pulled a face. “Three more long years to wait! If only we lived in Beryl. I could be happily married by now.”

The seventeen year old shook out the dishcloth she was using with a snap.

“Especially seeing as that you would be able to choose your own beau. Sometimes I wish we lived there too. Maybe Tirsa would still be with us if we did.” Thirteen year old Alieni said, her voice no more than a whisper. The girls were cleaning up after the delicious visiting day luncheon whilst the men-folk and their mother relaxed in the sitting room. They didn’t mind the work. It gave them a chance to speak more freely to one another. Her twin, Colette, placed an arm protectively around her. “Perhaps Tirsa will return soon, Alieni. We must not lose hope.”

Lidda joined them and stroked Alieni’s cheek. “Colette is right. We mustn’t stop hoping. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if she returned?”

“But would Daddo allow it?” Freda could not forget her father’s rage on the day that Tirsa ran away.

Lidda squared her shoulders. “I am sure he will. There is no need for Tirsa to marry Han now, and there is no reason for her not to marry Yoni.” Lidda turned back to the pile of dishes in the sink. As happy as she’d be for Tirsa to be able to marry her love, she couldn’t help feeling jealous. Who would she have married if Tirsa hadn’t run away? She’d heard whispers that Daddo had been eyeing Malak out as a possible husband for his second eldest daughter. Lidda knew Malak quite well. He was the son of the town butcher, and only a year or so older than herself. His friendly green eyes and wide smile had appealed to her during her school days, and on visits to the butcher shop. But it was too late now for a game of what if or if only. She belonged to Han. She couldn’t help feeling rather like a sacrificial goat. If Tirsa and Yoni were still alive, they were probably happily married and more deeply in love than before. Lidda mechanically 

handed the next dish to Freda. As for herself, she’d better quickly resign herself to her fate. A strong kick on one side of her belly brought one of the few smiles of the day to her face. Ah little one, perhaps there is hope yet for me. Perhaps your father will love me soon.

Chapter Four

Ettie drove as carefully as she could along the dirt road leading to Sybella. Tirsa sat beside her, her arms bracing her middle. The young woman’s due date was only a couple of weeks away, and Ettie prayed that the bumpy journey wouldn't hasten the baby's arrival. Yoni sat in the back of the truck along with the couple of bags they were taking along. She'd made him promise to come fetch her when they needed a lift back to the farm. There was no way she was going to let the little family travel by wagon or on foot.

Although sad to be taking leave of her young friends, Ettie felt peaceful. It was right and good that Tirsa and Yoni go back, if only to reassure their families of their safety.

“I can't help but feel bad about leaving you like this Ettie. There's so much to be done on the farm, even in the fall.” Tirsa glanced over at her friend.

“Now don't you go worrying about me, Tirsa.” Ettie patted her on the knee. “Elias assures me that his friend Lonan is super keen to help out, and besides, I was on my own before you arrived.”

Tirsa nodded. Elias’ friend had some farming experience, but he was keen to learn more about living off grid and had offered to help Ettie out for the month they'd be gone. Still, she hated to leave her little nest so close to the baby's arrival. When they returned home, their baby would probably be a couple of weeks old.

Ettie broke into her thoughts. “I'll have everything ready for your arrival. All you’ll need to do is take care of that little one and rest. Lonan’s even offered to stay on for another week if we need him to.”

Tirsa took a deep breath. The scenery along the road was becoming more and more familiar. Soon they would reach the edge of town. Out of respect for the feelings of the Elders and the other town's folk, they would go no further than the woods behind the town. 

“Are you sure you'll manage the walk?” Ettie eyed the rough terrain dubiously.

“Now it's you who needs to stop fretting, my friend.” Tirsa smiled. “I'll manage just fine. I need to get out of this truck and stretch my legs anyway.”

They planned to stop at Yoni’s parents’ farm first. Both Yoni and Tirsa had thought it wise to reach out cautiously to Tirsa's family from there.

“Well, here we are.” Ettie brought the truck to a stop where the dirt road narrowed to a track. The track would take Tirsa and Yoni through the woods and out into open farmland.

Tirsa prayed for the butterflies in her stomach to settle as she left the truck. Yoni was waiting with their bags slung over his shoulders and a broad grin on his handsome face. Tirsa couldn't help smiling back despite her fears. 

Ettie hugged them both, then before leaving, she took their hands in hers and prayed for Emanuel’s blessing to be upon them.

***

They had just entered the woods when a familiar figure stepped out onto the path in front of them.

“Emanuel!” Yoni and Tirsa cried out joyfully. 

Emanuel smiled and reached out for the bags Yoni was carrying. “I'll take those Yoni. Tirsa may need a little help over this rough ground.”

Yoni quickly complied. His heart and mind were bursting with questions, and he wondered which to voice first, but there was no need, Emanuel seemed to know all that was on the young couples’ minds. “I've been expecting you, and I am pleased that you have answered my call.” Emanuel's voice sobered. “It will not be easy, although some will be overjoyed on seeing you, others will be less so. The message you bring will not be well received by most.” Emanuel paused, “There is one little one in particular though, who is ready to hear it; who needs very badly to hear it.” Emanuel looked at Tirsa. “It is your sister, Lidda.”

“Lidda? Is she unwell?”

“She is in good health. You will understand once you have spoken to her.”

Tirsa nodded. She wished her feet could move faster. How she longed to be with Lidda; to help her to know the Creator's love. 

“I will do all I can, with Your help, Emanuel.”

Emanuel's smile lit up the dim surroundings. “I am always with you.” The trio had arrived at the field bordering the woods. “I will leave you now.” Emanuel nodded in the direction of the nearest farmhouse. “Yoni, your mother and father will be happy to see the two of you. Take care, children.” Yoni turned to bid Emanuel farewell, and found the spot at his side empty apart from their bags. The young couple stood still for a few moments, pondering all Emanuel had said before setting off to surprise Yoni's family.

***

“I see you have sent those two followers of yours on a mission.” A voice hissed behind Emanuel as he watched Yoni and Tirsa's progress. Emanuel turned to face his old enemy, who seemed to shrink as Emanuel looked down on him. “You will stay away from them and do no harm.”

Ubel's face twisted into a sneer as he mounted his dark horse. “I have every right to tempt them. This is my territory.”

“Only very temporarily. Your days and those of your minions are numbered. Like I said, stay away from my followers.”

Ubel's laugh cracked the air. “As you wish. I have other prey.”

“I'll be watching you, Ubel. You will not win. Remember that.”

Emanuel's gaze returned to the two small figures that were now nearing the farmhouse. He gave a signal, and several shining yet invisible servants followed after them into Sybella. To yet more, he gave one mission: to keep close watch on Ubel.

Chapter Five

“It's Yoni! And Tirsa!” Joyful voices rang through the farmyard as the young couple approached the house. It was a long, single story building capped by two barns. Tirsa struggled to put names to the crowd of happy faces surrounding them. Caro, Hester, Amon, Dodi….

“Where have you been? What happened? Tell us! Tell us!” 

Yoni tousled a few heads before shushing them. “We will tell you soon, once we are all together.”

Tirsa felt the childrens’ wide-eyed stares as they took in her large stomach and the patterned material of her dress. She smiled to reassure them as Yoni took her by the hand and led the group to the kitchen door. It opened before he could knock.

“I thought I was hearing things! Yoni! Son! I knew you'd return! And Tirsa!” Yoni's mother's words came out in a rush as she ushered them into the kitchen. Yoni dropped the bags in the corner and embraced his mother. “Mama, I missed you all so. I'm sorry for causing you to worry.”

Lena waved the apology away even as tears soaked her cheeks. “No need to apologize son. The main thing is that you're back. Amon! Quick! Fetch your father and the others from the pasture! Yoni can only tell us all about his adventure once they're here.”

The boy quickly complied and Lena turned her attention to Tirsa. Her gaze lingered for a moment on the girl's obviously pregnant form. Then without further ado, she embraced her before leading her to a chair near the fireplace. “Come. Sit. You must be tired. I will make tea while we wait.” 

***

Yoni's parents, Frederick and Lena, listened open-mouthed as he told them about his adventures. “Tirsa and I are married now.” Yoni smiled at his family. “And our first little one is due soon. But first I must tell you that I would not be here today if it hadn't been for Emanuel.” They, and his siblings gasped as he explained how he and Felix had fallen into a ravine after being led astray by an evil guide.

“It was Emanuel, our Creator who rescued us and breathed life back into our dead bodies.”

Tirsa nodded. “And in the meantime, I had been led to safety: to the farm of a wonderful widow named Ettie. She told me all she knew about Emanuel, and gave me his book.”

Yoni squeezed Tirsa's hand. “We are both believers now.”

Frederick stroked his long beard rhythmically. “I can see why. I have no reason to doubt what you say. You have always been honest, Yoni. As for you Tirsa, I have known you since you were a babe. I would like to hear more about the Creator who brought my son back to life. And,” he added, as he rose from his chair, “I would like to bestow my blessing on your marriage, and offer my home to you as long as you need it.”

***

“Two weeks until the wee one comes?” Lena's eyes widened. “The two of you must have Yoni's room. Reza can move in with Amon and Dodi for now.” Lena scurried about giving orders and fluttering her hands in the air. A grandchild! My first! Oh, it is exciting! Do you have enough nappies? Enough clothes? Never mind, I still have things from Caro. Oh! And Euphemia. Your mother! She will be beside herself with joy!”

Tirsa could only smile at her mother-in-law's excitement. She couldn't blame her if she'd forgotten the difficult circumstances of Tirsa's departure. 

“When will you go to your mother and father? Today?”

Yoni placed an arm protectively around his wife. “I think Tirsa should rest today. Tomorrow is soon enough to visit her family.”

Lena nodded and smiled. She was more than happy not to have to share the children just yet, and thought it best that Yoni and Tirsa tread carefully around the volatile Adolphus. Lena then turned to her brood and sent them in all directions in order to get ready for lunch, whilst Frederick ushered Yoni outside. He wanted to hear more about Yoni's near death experience. Lena planned to ask some questions of her own. To think she'd come so close to losing her oldest son!

***

Tirsa snuggled as close as she could to Yoni, and tried to get comfortable on the unfamiliar bed. Yoni's steady breathing soothed her. She cupped her hand under her belly as the rhythmic night time kicks of the little one began. Her mind and heart wandered back to dear Ettie, and to the farm. Would the animals and the garden be alright in their absence? Would Lonan be able to keep up with it all? Her thoughts turned to her family next. She could scarcely believe that she was about to see them after all these months! Surely it would be a happy reunion. Tirsa felt another strong kick beneath her ribs, and it reassured her. How could they possibly not be happy to see her? Surely all would go well. Tirsa allowed sleep to carry her toward the next day, but before she dozed off, she lifted up heartfelt prayers to her Creator for her family once more.

***

Frederick insisted on taking them in the wagon. “And if you don't mind, I'll wait out in the yard.” He didn't say what he was thinking out loud. Adolphus’ angry declarations after his daughter's departure were common knowledge. He was ready to carry the young couple and his grandchild to safety the moment the hothead erupted. He assumed that Lena had told them about Lidda's fast-tracked betrothal to Han, so he mentioned nothing of that. “Perhaps it will go well. Another grand-baby on the way should soften your father's heart, not so?”

Frederick smiled at his daughter-in-law.

As they drove up to the large farmhouse with its deep front porch and shade trees, Tirsa's eyes filled with tears. There it was. Her childhood home: a place of both happy and sad memories. The farm dogs began barking, and it wasn't long before the kitchen curtains moved. After a moment, the front door cracked open and Freda, a quizzical expression on her face, stepped out. She shaded her eyes as she tried to make out who was sitting on the wagon seat. Yoni's father she knew. But who was sitting beside him? Tirsa? And Yoni? Could it be? But the young woman was in her last stage of pregnancy, and she looked different somehow. 

“Tirsa? Is that you?” Freda ran forward, shoo-ing the dogs as she went. “Yoni?”

“Yes! Yes! It is us!” Tirsa was laughing through her tears. Freda looked so grown up, and yet so familiar. 

Yoni helped his bride down without delay, and the sisters were in each other's arms as soon as her feet touched the ground.

Freda finally let Tirsa go and inspected her from head to foot. “You've never looked more beautiful. And the baby? You are married to Yoni of course.” She smiled. “I knew you'd find each other.” Freda grinned then. “Come, Mama will be overjoyed.”

She and Tirsa turned at the same time, and saw the little crowd which had formed on the front porch.

Euphemia, Felice, Alieni, and Colette all stood frozen in place with their mouths hanging open. Felice and the girls broke the silence with cries of joy, but it was Euphemia who reached Tirsa's side first. She held on to her daughter as though she might disappear. How she wished to study her dear one's face, but her vision was completely obscured by her tears.

Frederick and Yoni looked on, heartened to witness the joyful reunion.

At last, Euphemia recovered herself sufficiently to speak. “Welcome home daughter. Yoni. Please. Please come in. You must tell me everything that has happened.”

Tirsa looked around nervously. “Where is Daddo? Will he mind?”

Euphemia waved a hand. “He has gone to Timnon for the day and will only be back later.” She shrugged. “Perhaps it is for the best. I will tell him about your return this evening.”

She invited Frederick to join them, but he politely declined.

Tirsa soon found herself seated around the large and oh so familiar kitchen table. She drank in the familiar surroundings. Her eyes traveled from face to face. “Mama, where is Lidda? Out in the fields with Detta and Denny?”

Euphemia turned abruptly from the wooden counter where she'd been arranging cups. Of course, Tirsa knew nothing of the wedding. Euphemia breathed deeply. “Your father gave Lidda to Han in your stead. They are married. Her first little one is due soon.” She paused and her eyes rested on her daughter once more. 

“To Han?” Tirsa's face paled at her mother's news. But she was not of an age to marry.”

Euphemia turned back to her tea making. “She was ready and willing. And after all, she has done you a favour. You are married to Yoni now. Your own little one must be due soon?”

Tirsa nodded. “In about two weeks.” She said nothing more, leaving Yoni to do the talking. Her poor sister. Rushed into marriage with Han. A substitute bride. No wonder they'd been sent back to Sybella. But would her sister receive her? Was she angry? Hurt? Betrayed?

“Is she happy?” Tirsa's voice was a mere whisper. 

“As happy as can be. She's taken to married life like a hen to her nest. You'll see.”

Tirsa caught the look that passed between Felice and Freda and wondered about it.

Felice rose from the table at the sound of a baby's cry. “Excuse me. There's someone else you need to meet.”

She returned soon with a darling baby in her arms. “Meet Detta junior. We call him Dettie. He's a year old now.”

The chubby, sleepy-eyed baby ducked his head shyly, but was soon happily feeding in his mother's arms. Tirsa couldn't take her eyes away from the sweet sight. “He's so beautiful, Felice. I'm sorry I missed meeting him sooner.”

Felice smiled, though her eyes were wet. “Don't worry, we'll catch up. All that matters is that you're back.”

***

The following day, Euphemia huffed and puffed her way across the fields to Frederick and Lena's house. Never before had she been so mad at her husband! Now she couldn't even invite her own daughter and her husband over for a meal or to stay. And it was all because of his stupid pride. 

After supper the previous night, a very good one at that, Euphemia had made him some coffee, then told him in excited tones about Tirsa and Yoni’s visit. His reaction had spoiled the entire evening.

“Here in my house? That disobedient girl? With Yoni? Married you say? And expecting a baby? I'd say that's mighty disrespectful after what she did.” Adolphus banged his cup down on the table. “And worse, to go and get married without my blessing to a man with no prospects! No. They will not be allowed under my roof!”

“Yoni owns land now Adolphus. He is able to support our daughter as well as children.”

Adolphus growled. “Land in the buffer zone. What sort of place is that to settle down in? No good can come of it.”

Euphemia changed tack. “But she is your daughter, and she is pregnant with our grandchild. Why not put the past behind you? Han and Lidda are happily married now.”

Adolphus’ face seemed to soften a little, but it hardened again quickly. “You and the girls may visit her but she may not come here.”

“But…”

“No, woman. I have decided. I no longer want to speak about this matter. And get me more coffee. You spoiled the last cup.”

Euphemia fumed silently. She thought back to the conversation she'd had with Lidda about men and about love. Right now, she felt very negative about the subject indeed. She had no clue whether Adolphus loved her, but she knew for certain that she felt no love at all for him. Stupid man!

By the time she was sitting at Lena's table with Tirsa at her side, Euphemia had calmed down. She wasn't about to give up though. There was a good chance that Adolphus would soften when his grandchild arrived, and that event was just around the corner.

“It's best if we visit here for the moment. Your father just needs some time to adjust. It's his pride, you know. I'm sure the baby will bring him round. You'll see.”

“I'm sure it will, Mama. Daddo has always loved babies. In the meantime, at least we can see you. And the others.” Tirsa had a sudden thought. “Do you think Lidda will mind if I visit her? I really want to see her again.”

Euphemia smiled. “I'm sure she'd love that. She's not getting out at all now, so she'd enjoy a visit. I've already sent word over to her that you're here and staying with Yoni's family, so you won't shock her if you arrive on her doorstep.”

“And what about Han? Will he approve of a visit?”

“Can't see why he wouldn't. I don't think he's mad at you anymore.”

Tirsa took a steadying breath. “Good. We'll go over soon. Before I'm confined myself.”

Chapter Six

“I don't believe you're actually here! I've been longing for you to come for so long.” Lidda’s embrace was warm. “Welcome to my new home.” She smiled as she led them into the spacious kitchen. “Han is out in the pasture, but he'll be in soon.” Lidda moved over to the range where she stirred the contents of a large pot, and moved the kettle over the flame. “Tea will be ready soon. And you'll join us for the midday meal won't you?”

“If it's no trouble, sister. You need to get some rest.” Tirsa patted the chair alongside her. “Why don't you sit a while. Tea can wait.” 

Lidda gave her pot one more stir before sinking gratefully into the chair. “I can't wait for these two weeks to be over. I so want to meet my little one.”

“I feel the same way. Perhaps our babies will share a birthday.” Tirsa smiled.

She looked over at Yoni, who gestured towards the door. 

“I'll go find Han. See how his cows are doing.” Tirsa knew he was giving her time alone with Lidda.

She nodded and smiled her thanks.

Tirsa reached over and took Lidda's hand in hers. “Are you happy, sister? Does Han treat you well?”

Lidda averted her eyes. “It is what I always wanted. Marriage and children.” She looked at Tirsa then. “Don't feel bad sister. It was Daddo's decision. Han treats me well. He does not beat me as some men do. I have plenty of food, and now a baby of my own.” She stopped, and caressed her stomach. 

Tirsa nodded but she had noticed that Lidda had sounded uncertain, almost as though she were trying to convince herself of the truth of her words.

“Tell me,” Lidda said, suddenly changing the subject. “Freda told me a strange story about Yoni. Did he really die and come back to life?”

“You're right,” said Tirsa. “It is a very strange story. But it is completely true.” She shuddered inwardly to think how near she'd come to losing dear Yoni. “An evil guide lured him to the edge of a steep drop. He and Felix were lying lifeless at the bottom of the ravine when Emanuel found them. He restored and healed their battered bodies then brought them to the river where I found them.”

Lidda leaned forward. “Who is this Emanuel you speak of? And how can he bring people back to life? Is he a magician?”

Tirsa's eyes lit up and she tried her best to describe Emanuel to her sister. “Oh, no Lidda. He is certainly not a magician. He is the Creator of Adama and all the starry hosts. The Creator of all, and our Saviour.” She smiled at Lidda. “Now He is our friend and companion too, and he can also be yours if you call on him, Lidda. I have his book if you want to see it. It's like a love letter to us all.”

“A love letter?”

“Yes, Lidda. The Creator loves us. He loves you.”

Lidda stood to attend to her duties. “You have given me much to think of Tirsa. Perhaps I will look at your book.” She took plates down from the cupboard. “You know, Tirsa, there's something different about you. You seem so at peace.”

“I am Lidda. You can have the same peace too.”

At that moment, they heard scraping at the back door along with the sound of laughter. Han and Yoni entered the kitchen. Han nodded politely at Tirsa before inviting Yoni to be seated. He then washed his hands before sitting opposite Yoni. The two men continued talking about livestock whilst Lidda served the food. “I'm wanting to expand to a couple of dairy cows soon.” Said Yoni.

“Well, you're welcome to come to me for advice anytime.” Han raised his mug in a toast to his guests. “Anytime.”

***

“Tirsa's asking for you ma'am. Her pains are getting closer.” Amon gasped out the words his mother had told him to say.

Euphemia tossed the dish rag to Freda. “Here, you girls finish cleaning up. I'm going to get Daddo to hitch up the horse.” It's about time he got involved.

She charged through to the sitting room, bearing a couple of lanterns. “Hurry, Adolphus, hitch the wagon. Tirsa's time is here.”

A look which was part exasperation part curiosity crossed his face. “And this gives you the right to order me about, does it, woman? Why couldn't Frederick or Yoni have come to fetch you?”

Euphemia glared at him. “The baby is your grandchild too. Now hurry!”

Adolphus grumbled, but followed her orders. So far, he had stuck to his guns and had refused to see either his daughter or her husband. More than two weeks had passed. As they rumbled down the wagon track, Euphemia sitting tense on the seat beside him, he figured he could offer his daughter a little charity. After all, he had made his point. Icy fear snaked through his heart as they neared the farm. Tirsa was laboring to bring his second grandchild into the world. What if something went wrong? What if she didn't make it? Both she and the baby could die. Such tragedies were common. Adolphus urged the horses on. Euphemia needed to be at Tirsa's side. He'd be able to breathe easier knowing his wife would be helping at the birth. Adolphus brought the horses to a stop at the gate.

“Hurry, woman! Get down now! Our daughter needs you.”

Euphemia just smiled as she followed his orders. Things were going nicely according to her plan.

***

 

Euphemia took one look at the scene, and saw what was needed. Yoni was doing a great job of supporting his wife, as Lena fussed around with cloths and water, but what her girl needed was coaching to get through the hard pains and to push the baby out. 

“Mama, you came.” Tirsa's face relaxed. “Thank you.”

Euphemia smoothed the hair off of Tirsa's face, then drew Lena out into the passage. After a quick consultation, she returned. Tirsa had been in mild labour all day. The pains were becoming intenser now and were closer together. She was going to need help through each one.

“Don't breathe deep. Take shallow breaths through the pain. Yoni, your job is to hold her hand.” And, she added, “Pray to your Creator”

Euphemia encouraged her daughter to stand and to walk around between pains.

“I can't Mama. I can't do this.” Tirsa felt as though the baby would never come.

“You can, and you must.” 

Tirsa nodded. She prayed her own prayers. And she felt Emanuel's presence in the room. In the midst of her pain, she felt peace.

The pains grew stronger and stronger as they eased her little one into the world. In the early hours of the morning, she was ready for the birthing stool. Euphemia caught the plump red-faced infant with hair like her mother's own, and handed her tenderly to her daughter. 

Yoni gazed in awe at the little one. “She's so beautiful. Praise God.”

“What will her name be?” Euphemia and Lena wanted to know. “Her name is Angelica.” Tirsa’s smile was serene. She barely felt a thing as her body finished up its task. Before long, with help from the women, she was tucked up in bed with her little angel at her breast.

Euphemia kissed them softly before leaving the room. Tired but happy, she entered the kitchen and was surprised to find Adolphus sitting at the table nursing a large mug of coffee. “You stayed?”

Frederick answered for him. “I found Adolphus sitting in that wagon of his, and persuaded him to come inside and keep me company.”

“Can I see them now?” Adolphus’ voice sounded meek, almost contrite.

Euphemia smiled. “Come.”

Chapter Seven

At Adolphus’ insistence, Tirsa, Yoni, and baby Angelica moved over to his house after Tirsa had recovered sufficiently. He was eager to spend as much time with them as possible before they returned to their own farm. Adolphus hated the idea of them leaving, but his son-in-law needed to support his family, and Adolphus comforted himself with the knowledge that they would only be living a short distance away in the buffer zone. He would have put his foot down if the young couple had wanted to take his granddaughter further north.

Tirsa, for her part, was eager to be as close as possible to Lidda. The young woman was likely to give birth at any moment.

“Please take me over to see her, Yoni. I am strong enough.”

Yoni agreed. “Perhaps seeing Angelica will bring Lidda’s labour on.” He smiled. “Just wrap her up well. The air’s getting colder now.”

“OK, Daddy.” Tirsa teased. 

Yoni just smiled. “My turn to hold her. Why don't you get ready for your visit.”

***

“Oh, Tirsa, she's darling. How I wish I could have been there when she was born.” Lidda held her arms out for the baby. “I need to practice.”

“Any signs of labour?” Tirsa asked hopefully. Lidda certainly looked as though she could give birth at any moment. 

“Not really. A few cramps, but they always fade away to nothing.” She sighed. “I'm trying to keep myself busy; to not think about it too much.”

Tirsa glanced around the room. The stone floor looked newly swept and the rugs had a fresh look too. Lidda's pottery dinnerware was neatly arranged on shelves, and Tirsa spotted a basket of sewing in the corner. “You have been busy.”

“Not busy enough. Han's younger brother helps with my outside chores now, so all I have is housework. This baby needs to come quickly.”

With her long, braided hair and simple blue dress she looked impossibly young to be having a baby. Tirsa prayed silently for her sister and all that lay ahead of her. Fortunately, she would have plenty of help from their mother, sisters, and other female relatives, but having a new-born baby was a big adjustment as she well knew.

Angelica began to root around in Lidda's arms, then started to cry when she realized she wasn't being held by her mother.

Tirsa settled in for a nursing session, while Lidda prepared some herbal tea and a snack. Once seated opposite Tirsa, she couldn't help but stare at her little niece. The baby's hair was as black as Tirsa's, but the little one's face resembled Yoni’s. Lidda couldn't help asking the question that niggled at her mind. “Does Yoni love you more now that the baby's here, Tirsa?”

Tirsa lifted Angelica up to burp her and patted the little back softly. She wondered at the strange question. “Well, Yoni loved me for myself, long before Angelica was born. I suppose you could say that our love has deepened since her arrival in our lives, though. Perhaps babies have that effect. They do soften hearts. After all, look what happened with Daddo.”

Lidda laughed. Yes, Daddo was a good example of the softening effect of babies. Perhaps Han would become a different man once the baby arrived. How she hoped he would! She felt heartened by Tirsa's comments, although admittedly, it was hard to be reminded of just how loved her sister was. 

Tirsa continued feeding her baby, and Lidda noticed how lovely her sister looked with her black curls tied back with a ribbon and her pretty long-sleeved dress.

She couldn't help feeling ugly and fat beside her. Would she ever feel lovely and loved?

As though reading her thoughts, Tirsa looked up suddenly. “Have you given thought yet to what we spoke of last time I visited?” She reached for the cloth bag beside her. “I brought the Creator’s book with me. Perhaps you’d like to have a look.”

Lidda reached for the book. “I remember that you called it a love letter. I thought that was rather strange.”

Lidda nodded. “I suppose it does sound strange. I knew nothing of it myself before Ettie gave it to me to read. I call it a love letter because it tells of the Creator’s love for us, and how he died for our sin.”

Lidda was silent for a long while as she paged cautiously through the Book. 

“He loves you too, Lidda. You are very loved. Don't forget that, OK?”

Lidda made as though to give the Book back, but Tirsa shook her head. “It's yours to keep, Lidda. Read it. Perhaps Han will read it too.”

Lidda pressed the Book to her chest. “Thank you. I’m not sure whether Han will, but I will read it.” She stood to clear the table, and walked towards the sink, but halfway across she stopped. “Oh, Tirsa, something’s happening. Mama said my waters could break. Oh, Tirsa! It's happening!”

Lidda stood with the cups in her hands, seemingly frozen in place. “I need to clean this up. I need to..”

Tirsa placed her sleeping baby in the padded basket she'd brought with her. “No you don’t, Lidda.” Tirsa gently removed the cups from her sister’s hands. “You're going to come with me to the bedroom.”

Tirsa helped her sister to change into a nightdress and placed a thick quilt over the mattress before helping her to get under the covers. “Now, I want you to rest and breathe while I go fetch Han and Yoni. Think about your beautiful baby Lidda. He or she is on its way!”

Lidda nodded, but her eyes were wide. “The pains are starting. Please hurry.”

Tirsa hurried from the house and made straight for the barn. She felt sure that Han’s cows would be spending more time indoors now that it was cooler. Perhaps the two men would be there. She prayed as she ran, asking Emanuel for help and blessing.

Tirsa nearly wept aloud when she spied Yoni and Han in one of the stalls. “Quick! Come! The baby is coming!”

Han let out a whoop and sped for the door, and Yoni was soon at her side. 

Back in the house, Tirsa noted with relief that Angelica was still sleeping. “Yoni, I must stay with her. I know Mama will come, but she needs me. Our prayers. Please bring some more things for us. I am sure I can use one of the spare rooms.”

Yoni embraced her. “If you promise me you’ll rest.”

He and Han got into the wagon Yoni had borrowed from Adolphus, and were soon off at a gallop to fetch Euphemia. Tirsa turned immediately to tend to Lidda, taking her sleeping baby with her.

“I didn't know the pains would be so bad, sister. They come so fast.” 

“It is because your waters broke suddenly. You’ll have that baby in your arms before you know it.” Tirsa encouraged Lidda into a more upright position, then fetched some rags and a bowl of water. She patted the perspiring face, and fixed her sister’s braids around her head. 

Lidda tried to smile. “I'm going to be brave. I don't want to wake Angelica.”

Tirsa pressed her hand. “Don't worry about that. Now tell me when you get another pain.”

***

Euphemia arrived with Freda in what seemed like minutes. Tirsa gladly let her mother take over, while she sought out a bedroom where she could change and bathe Angelica. Then she rested on the bed to feed her baby, praying all the while for her little sister. Lidda’s cries tore at her heart. How she prayed that Lidda would experience the same peace and comfort that she had. Tirsa dozed off whilst praying and nursing. She woke two hours later to the sound of a baby's wail. She turned quickly to tend to Angelica, but her baby was still sound asleep. Someone knocked softly on the door. Freda came into the room and beckoned her to follow.

The sweetest sight met her eyes: Lidda lay against the pillows, peaceful and happy, and wearing a fresh gown. Tucked into her arms, and already feeding hungrily, was her little baby. Tirsa tiptoed closer to get a good look. “It's a boy.” Whispered Lidda. “Isn't he wonderful? He looks just like Han.”

Tirsa bent down and kissed them both gently. “He's so lovely. And so are you, sister. Rest now. And enjoy him.”

Lidda smiled before looking down once more at the precious baby in her arms. And she fell in love.

Chapter Eight

(Author's note: Hannes is pronounced Hun-nes.)

Two months had gone by since the birth of Lidda's sweet little man. Tirsa and Yoni had returned home one week after his birth. Adolphus had insisted on transporting them back in his covered wagon and made them promise to visit again before Angelica grew too big. Lidda's love for her baby grew daily, even as her hopes that Han would grow to love her faded. 

Hannes kicked his legs and gave a toothless grin. Lidda cooed and laughed. The little one was everything to her. As much as she loved Tirsa, it was better that she'd left. It was painful to see the love between her sister and Yoni: the kind of love she was unlikely to ever experience.

Han was a doting father: he loved to hold his little boy and talk with him whenever he got the chance. But this made Lidda feel even more invisible, as Han gave the little attention he'd previously given her to his son. If she hadn't loved little Hannes so much, she would have been jealous of her own child.

More and more, Han's regular night time embraces left her feeling empty, not loved or cherished as she so wanted to feel.

***

Whilst she sat nursing Hannes, Lidda would reach for the curious book which Tirsa had given her. She was making slow but steady progress through it. As she read, she recognized some of her own struggles in the stories it told: love-less unions, jealousy, discontent, envy, strife, and disappointment. These were true stories, Tirsa had told her: stories about real people: people like themselves. The Creator's love for these difficult people shone through in His Book. Lidda couldn't quite understand why He loved them, but she found herself being drawn to such an incredible love. A love far beyond anything she'd experienced on Adama. Then she thought of Tirsa and of Yoni. She'd caught a glimpse of the Creator's love in them, she realized. She remembered Tirsa's tender care and prayers for her as she had laboured to bring Hannes into the world. She remembered Yoni’s kindness and friendliness towards herself and Han. Yes, perhaps she should seek after the Creator and His love. But first, she needed to try harder to win Han’s affection. Perhaps once Han loved her, she could turn her full attention to the Creator and His Book.

***

Lidda watched from the kitchen window as the wind chased yellow and orange leaves around the farmyard where Han stood talking to a tall stranger. They spoke for a while, then seemed to shake hands on an agreement. The stranger turned to go, but before he did, he looked up at the house, and Lidda took a step back from the window, hoping he hadn't seen her.

Before long, Han came stomping through the mudroom and into the kitchen. He seemed quite pleased with himself as he washed up for lunch, before taking Hannes from her arms. The sleepy baby woke fully on seeing his father, and Lidda sighed, knowing she'd have to nurse and settle him again.

“I'll miss you when I'm gone, little one. But it won't be for longer than two weeks, I promise. Daddy's just going to look at some cows and do some trading.”

Lidda stammered. “I…I didn't know you were going…”

“I wasn't sure myself until now. But Boris has agreed to help out on the farm alongside Vinny until I return.”

“Boris?”

“Yes, Boris, woman. Didn't I mention him before? He's new in town. Does odd-jobs where he can for food and lodging. I think your father hired him a while back.”

Lidda shrank inwardly at Han's harsh tone. She hated it when he called her ‘woman’ and treated her like a child. But she said nothing and continued to serve his food. Then she poured his coffee before reaching out for Hannes so he could eat.

“Didn't we eat this same meal yesterday?” Han grumbled. “You'd think with all the time you have on your hands you could have cooked something else. My mother had babies crawling all around her and yet she managed to cook and bake each day.”

Lidda opened her mouth to defend herself, but clamped it shut again. She sat quietly nursing Hannes while Han ate and lectured. “You hold him too much. That's your problem. You'll spoil him. Perhaps I should arrange for my mother to come train you. There's nothing she doesn't know about raising children.” Lidda quailed inwardly at the prospect of her husband's mother descending upon her. Perhaps Han would forget his suggestion if she tried harder to please him.

“I'll be gone for a while.” Han announced. If you need anything, just speak to Vinny. Boris will be helping with the milking, and Omar will still be along to help with the goats and chickens.”

“You're leaving in the morning?” Lidda ventured, hoping he wouldn't snap at her.

Han nodded. “Just make sure that my provisions and clothes are ready.”

Chapter Nine

Lidda struggled to wake the following morning. Hannes had woken several times in the night, with the result that her sleep had been patchy. But she remembered her resolve to try harder, and pushed herself through her early morning chores of stoking the fire, pumping water, and then preparing a hearty breakfast for the men. Today, she'd have to prepare enough for four large appetites as the new hired man would be joining them. Han would be setting off straight after the meal.

Guilt crept into her conscience as she realized how pleased she felt to be getting a break from Han. Part of her looked forward to having the house to herself, along with the extra rests she'd be able to take. On the other hand, his going away was a bit of a setback as far as her plans to finally win his attention went. That is unless absence truly made the heart grow fonder.

***

“My wife. Lidda.” Han seemed to lay emphasis on the word wife, as he came into the kitchen. “She will make breakfast for you each morning, as well as lunch and dinner.”

Lidda glanced at the man called Boris, then averted her eyes again quickly. She'd never seen such a good-looking man. His features were all perfectly even.His hair was the colour of ripe wheat, and he was well-built. Feeling awkward, she nodded, then turned back to her duties at the range. Mercifully, Hannes was still asleep in his basket, so she was able to focus on the eggs and ham. Meanwhile, the men began to devour the oats porridge she'd set on the table. Once she'd set out the rest of the food, she poured coffee. As she placed a mug before the stranger, he caught her eye and smiled slightly. Lidda merely nodded once more, before serving Vinny and Omar. Boris seemed friendly enough. She wondered why such a handsome man was seemingly still unattached and working as a labourer. But she didn't have time to let her mind drift. Later. There’ll be plenty of time to daydream once Hans is gone. Right now, I need to get his food packed.

***

Lidda sank heavily into her rocker. She'd finally got all the dishes washed after grabbing a bite to eat. Now, it was time to give Hannes his breakfast, before the next round of chores. She planned to make a hearty stew for the men. She could serve it with bread for lunch, and with potatoes for supper.

Feeling more relaxed now that she had her day planned out, Lidda flipped her braid over her shoulder and arranged a heavy shawl over herself and Hannes. Not only was it cold, she also didn't want to take a chance on the stranger seeing her as she went about her motherly duty.

Lidda thought back to Han’s departure that morning, allowing her mind to dwell on all the little disappointments and hurts of the past few hours. Han had laughed and joked with the men, only speaking to her when he wanted more coffee or food. He showed no reluctance at all to be leaving her, and his parting kiss had been rough, containing no tenderness at all. Any tenderness he had was poured upon Hannes, as he held and cuddled the little one before leaving. It hurt. It hurt so bad. 

Now, Lidda allowed an ocean of bottled up disappointment, sadness, and even grief to flow. Yes, she realized; she was grieving for the love she'd never have. As her tears fell, she wiped at her face with her shawl, ever conscious of the baby in her arms. She held him more closely to her heart. It was time to face up to reality: Han would never love her the way she wanted to be loved. But she had Hannes. She would pour her love out on him, and all the babies to come. Yes, that is what she would do. Lidda sat staring at the dying fire in the range, while her hope that Han would ever change died inside her heart.

***

“You're a fine cook.” Boris polished his plate and held it up for more. “May I trouble you for a second helping?”

Vinny snickered. Fancy the stranger with his affected manners! If he carried on complementing Lidda for every little thing she made, she'd get a swollen head. And he felt sure his brother wouldn't like that. But anyways, the nonsense would stop once Han was home. Otherwise, Vinny had no complaints regarding Boris. He kept his half of the bachelors’ quarters neat and tidy, and was a hard worker. Vinny also liked the fact that he didn't chatter all day: just got on with his work. The man was too good-looking though, and Vinny was going to be sure to keep him well away from his girl. Ena wasn't the girl his father had in mind for him to marry in a couple years time, but he wanted to keep her until then. His father had set aside good-sized parcels of land for both himself and his younger brother, Omar. In the meantime, both young men worked on Han's farm. Han's elderly parents lived with the eldest of their seven daughters.

Vinny scraped his chair back and Omar followed suit. “We'll head out to the barn so long Boris.”

The man nodded. “I'll be there shortly. You go ahead. This coffee's too good to hurry.”

Vinny rolled his eyes. “It's jest ordinary brew. Nothing special.”

Boris just shook his head. Once the men were gone, he flashed a smile at Lidda. “Well, no matter what Vinny says, it's the best coffee anyone's ever brewed for me. Thank you.”

Lidda blushed, but she couldn't keep herself from returning his smile. Boris had such nice manners. In practical, down-to-earth, no-nonsense Sybella, manners like his were rare. She'd gotten so accustomed to her cooking being taken for granted, that she soaked in the praise. “It's my pleasure. Glad you enjoyed it.” Lidda felt bold as she said the words. But why shouldn't she say them? She had worked hard, and her cooking was good.

This wasn't the first time Boris had complemented her cooking, and Tirsa had to admit that it made a nice change from Han's ingratitude. Not even Vinny or Omar said thank you when she served them. She smiled. Hopefully Boris’ good manners would rub off on them. Wouldn't that shock Han?

Boris surprised her further by bringing his mug and plate over to the sink. “You must be tired after all that cooking and serving. I need to get to the barn, but how about I get some water for you before I go?”

Lidda nearly dropped the bucket she was carrying. Boris stretched out his hand and took it gently from her. “Let me help. I want to. Besides, I am the hired help.” He grinned, and Lidda found herself looking into his eyes. So friendly.

“But that's women’s work.” Her protest sounded half-hearted in her own ears.

Boris just laughed and headed jauntily towards the pump, as though he couldn't care less. He was back shortly, and presented the bucket to her with a flourish. Then before Lidda could protest, he filled the large pot she used for warming water. “There you go. My way of saying thank you for your hospitality.” Boris exited the kitchen with a flourish of his cap. His hair glinted in the pale morning light. “See you at supper time, Lidda. I'm sure looking forward to it.”

Lidda was too startled to respond, although her mouth had curved into a spontaneous smile. She turned back to her baby and her chores, thinking how nice Boris was. Whose stupid idea had it been anyway, that men needn't help the women folk? Personally, she thought it made a pleasant change.

***

More than a week had passed since Han’s departure. Guiltily, Lidda admitted to herself that she missed him not at all. Her days were still busy, and Hannes still woke her in the night, but despite this, she hadn't felt more rested in a long time. She took long naps each afternoon without fear of receiving a scolding for being lazy, and she held little Hannes as long as she could, regularly allowing him to fall asleep in her arms. Boris continued to sweeten her days by doing little chores for her whenever the other men weren't nearby. His appreciation for her cooking made her want to excel even more in the kitchen. Sometimes, as she rocked and fed Hannes, she'd find herself fantasizing about Boris being her husband instead of Han. She brushed aside any guilty feelings by reminding herself of Han’s meanness. Surely she deserved a little pleasure, even if only in her imagination?

Chapter Ten

Lidda was preparing the midday meal, when she heard a soft knock on the kitchen door. “Lidda, may I come in? It's me, Boris. I cut myself out in the pasture. Vinny said you'd help.”

Lidda opened the door quickly. “Oh dear! Is it bad? Sit down and I'll take a look at it.” Lidda fussed over the cut. It was pretty deep and nasty looking.

“This is going to be a bit painful,” she apologized, as she began cleaning the wound. 

Boris waved her concerns away. “It's nothing. Do what you must.”

Lidda worked carefully, then bandaged the wound with a clean strip of cloth. “There. But I'll need to check it and clean it every day to stop infection.”

“Can the treatment involve an extra cup of coffee and conversation?” Boris' blue eyes twinkled. “I might agree to such an arrangement.”

Lidda laughed. “If it helps to make things less painful, then sure.”

***

Lidda knew she shouldn't encourage Boris to stay longer than necessary, but she enjoyed his company tremendously. She wondered whether this is what it felt like to fall in love with someone. 

Boris came faithfully for his dressing to be changed each day, and Lidda would pour him coffee and spoil him with a few baked goods. She noticed that although he'd smile and coo a little at Hannes, he paid more attention to her, asking after her well being each time.

“Your husband, Han, is very lucky to have you. May I ask how the two of you met and fell in love?” Lidda’s hand shook as she removed the old bandage. She hardly knew how to answer. “We never met.” Lidda averted her eyes, and gazed at Hannes who was playing with his toes on his blanket. “The marriage was arranged by my father.”

“I see.” Lidda felt compelled to look once more into Boris’ eyes. They were like two pools of sympathy and compassion. “He doesn’t love you, does he?”

Lidda shook her head. Somehow, she managed to finish bandaging Boris’ wound through her tears. “No. He doesn't love me. And I don't believe he ever will. I accept that now.”

“Sit down,” Lidda. Boris’ voice was so gentle. She complied. He took his hand in her own. “Do you know how beautiful you are? You are lovely Lidda. You are bright and intelligent. You deserve so much better.”

As Boris squeezed her hand and looked at her with such sweet understanding, she found herself pouring out her heart to him.

What was in fact only a few minutes, felt like an hour of comfort and release, and once all her tears had flowed, she found herself agreeing to meet her comforter in the barn under cover of darkness.

***

So, this is what love feels like. Lidda's heart was thrilled. She pushed all thoughts of Han and the fact that she was a married woman aside. Somehow, she got through the rest of the afternoon. As supper time approached, she feared that her feelings for Boris would be displayed on her face for the other men to see, so she made pains to keep her eyes downcast as she served the meal by lamplight. Boris complemented her cooking as usual, but the other men took no notice. They'd become used to his strange ways, which had indeed rubbed off on them a little, as they now said “Thank you” from time to time.

Lidda only made eye contact with Boris once. The look he gave her caused her heart to flutter wildly, so she turned back to the range once more and took a deep breath.

Boris nodded meaningfully at her as he left. Lidda nodded back, not daring to utter a word.

She found that the water bucket had been filled. Her resolve to go ahead and meet with Boris deepened. A vague sense of unease niggled at her mind, but she pushed it aside and she deliberately kept her eyes averted from The Book which sat on the shelf.

***

It was hard to feed Hannes and not think of his father, but Lidda kept telling herself that she deserved some happiness. She dared not think of the consequences. Illogically, she imagined herself running off with Boris: they would take Hannes with them of course. A baby needed its mother. Anyway, Han deserved to be abandoned. A man like him didn't deserve a loving wife and a baby. Lidda's conscience pricked at her, but she stiffened her spine. No. Boris was the man she needed. Not Han. Han had never been her choice anyway. She didn't owe him anything. She repeated her arguments to herself as she finished feeding her baby. She let Hannes go off into a deep sleep in her arms before laying him in his crib. Mama needs to go Hannes. I hope you'll understand one day. I love you. 

***

Lidda kissed Hannes softly before tiptoeing from the room. Then, in the bedroom she shared with Han, she changed into her nicest dress and loosened her braids. Boris had told her she was beautiful, and she believed him.

Lidda closed the kitchen door softly, then walked on bare feet to the barn. Boris was waiting for her in the shadows near the door. 

“I can't be long.” She whispered. “Hannes will wake for his next feed in a couple of hours.”

Boris took her hands in his and drew her into the dark barn. A little moonlight lit the cavernous space. “It is enough time for what we need, not so?”

He led her to an empty stall. “Tell me more about your life Lidda. Tell me about your dreams.”

Boris' soft voice put Lidda at ease. Here was a man who obviously cared for her, who asked how she was feeling. She relaxed and sat close beside him on the bedding. 

“All I want is to be loved.” Lidda said shyly. The darkness made it easy to be honest. “Han treats me like one of his cows.” She gestured around the barn. “I want something more than that.”

“Of course you do,” Boris soothed her. He moved closer to her and placed an arm about her. “I believe that I may have what you've been craving, Lidda. Love. Laughter. Fun.” He stroked her cheek, “I love you, Lidda. Be mine. Leave Han.”

“Oh, Boris…” Lidda closed her eyes. Boris leaned closer to kiss her, but as he did so, Lidda heard a clear voice calling her through the night. She had no idea how she knew, but it was coming from the house. Han? Could it be that he'd come home and found her gone and Hannes all alone?

Lidda stood. “I must go! I think Han is back. I must go!”

Boris made to grab her. He let out a sound half growl, half grunt, but Lidda was already halfway across the yard.

***

Lidda ran into the kitchen. She looked around frantically, but there was no sign that Han had returned. The room was undisturbed. She approached the bedroom quietly, twisting her hair into a tight coil as she walked. Perhaps Han had left his things outside, and was waiting in the room, thinking she'd gone outside for a moment. The door was standing wide open.

Lidda saw a figure standing next to the crib. Hannes lay peacefully sleeping in the man's arms. In the lamplight, she saw clearly that the hands which held her son bore deep scars.

The man looked at her with a look of deep, pure, love. “Hannes was crying.”

“Emanuel?”

He nodded.

“Boris…” She began

“Go and see.” Emanuel pointed to the window. 

Lidda peered out towards the barn. She heard, rather then saw the commotion: flashes of light, the clashing of swords, and a shriek that filled her with raw fear.

“But he…” Lidda tried again, struggling to understand.

Emanuel looked at her with sympathy. His tone though, held a note of rebuke. “Boris is otherwise known as Ubel. When he is not going about as a traveller on a dark horse, he appears as a handsome light-haired man. When he heads back to his lair, he shape-shifts back to the dragon he is.”

Lidda paled and grasped the window sill for support.

“He is pure evil, Lidda. Tonight you nearly sold your soul to him. Do you understand?” Emanuel’s eyes filled with compassion for the young woman. She saw it, and felt strengthened.

“You would have died if you had done so.” Emanuel stepped forward and held little Hannes out to her. “Don't fear. My servants have dealt with him and will stand guard. You can sleep in peace.”

“Thank you.” Lidda said softly.

“Lidda,” Emanuel seemed to be looking straight into her heart as he said her name. “You are loved.”

“I know.” She whispered. But Emanuel had vanished.

Lidda rushed from room to room, hoping that she'd find him. She had so many questions. 

Then, as she walked back into the kitchen, the soft glow from the range illuminated The Book, and Lidda took it gladly from its place on the shelf.

Epilogue

Lidda bustled around happily as she got ready for the big day. Nothing less than a large fruit cake would do for the gathering. Tirsa and Yoni were bringing their brood of four for a month of catching up and visiting. It was a yearly tradition, which was supplemented by trips to their farm in the buffer zone by the doting grandparents and other family members. Lidda herself had paid a visit to Tirsa's farm with Han's blessing, and everyone had grown very fond of Grandma Ettie as they all called her.

“Come children. Get cleaned up. They will be here soon! Hannes, help Tirsa and Tekoa to wash their hands.” Lidda smiled. The twins were a busy twosome, but their big brother kept an eye on them. She looked into the crib Han had made for Hannes and saw that baby Adonie was waking just in time to see what all the fuss was about. Han's wish for plenty of sons to help on the farm was coming true. As for Lidda, she viewed each as a gift from Emanuel: each one a blessing and a promise.

“They're here, they're here!” Hannes cried as he rushed from the porch, waving madly at the truck making its way up the farm road.

Tirsa emerged from the truck first, carrying little Ben Yoni. Next, out tumbled Angelica, Frederika, and Addo. Both Addo and his cousin, Adonie had been named in honour of their doting grandfather. Frederika's name gave honour to Yoni’s father.

Han emerged just as Yoni got out of the truck. He slapped him good-naturedly on the back, and peppered him with questions. Truth be told, he was thinking about getting a truck himself, not to mention some of the gadgets Yoni and Tirsa used on their farm.

Then Han kissed Lidda in front of them all. “Come inside everyone. My woman's been cooking and baking up a storm, and I can't wait to tuck in to her good food.”

Everyone laughingly complied. Lidda's heart warmed towards her husband. With Emanuel's help, they were falling in love with him, and with each other.

***

The end

Thank you so much for reading my story. If you were blessed, please share.

Love and prayers,

Alison

Ps. If you haven't read the first book, you can find it here: Link

And here is the link to the third book in the series! Angelica's Journey